


what you deserve

by vaporrub



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Child Abuse, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Friendship/Love, M/M, POV Second Person, POV Third Person Limited, Runaway
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:56:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24410941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vaporrub/pseuds/vaporrub
Summary: You're not going back. You don't want to and the hunger in your stomach and the dirt under your nails is better than living under that roof.
Relationships: Dave Strider & Everyone, John Egbert/Dave Strider
Kudos: 19





	1. Chapter 1

“Who. Are you messaging, little man.” Dirk doesn’t say it like a question. He asks Dave like it’s a demand. He wants to know and he's going to know.

Dave shrugs it off, blowing hot air out of his mouth in a huff.

“I don’t ask twice, Dave.”

Dave can't bring himself to groan, he doesn't want to show his fear either, so instead he plays it off like he hardly cares.

Dave casually answers, “my best friend.” 

Dave was sure his older bro wasn’t happy with that reply.

Still, his bro did nothing. He just stared directly at his younger brother.

He slowly lifted his hand, “let me see your phone.”

“What the fuck, man!?” Dave took a step back.

“Don't make me ask twice. **Now.”**

“No!" Dave stood his ground. "I’m not letting you talk to him, you’re just going to scare him!”

“You can hand it over now, boy. or I'll take it.”

Dave pocketed his phone and prepared himself for a fight, but bro doesn’t give Dave the chance, he rushes behind Dave and pulls it out of his jean's back pocket.

“BRO!” Dave started pulling at his older bro's arms. Trying to get the phone back from him.

His older bro scrolled through the messages and let out a small huff from in between his lips,

"You oughta stop talking to the boy, don't need you getting into any trouble."

"What!? What trouble?!" Dave ask, "what do you mean?!"

"You're not that fucking stupid. You know what I mean."

“Bro! He’s straight! _I’m_ straight!”

“Sure.” Bro drops his arm and Dave takes back his phone, but bro is still holding onto it.

"You're really gonna tell me you don't have a thing for this kid?" Bro asks his younger bro with hints of anger in his monotone voice.

"I don't." Dave shakes his head, "and I'm straight, by the way, so there's that shit."

Bro gives Dave another small huff from his lips. He's frustrated with how idiotic his little bro is acting, pretending he isn't all over this Egbert kids ass.

"Listen, I don't want you messaging that Egbert boy, least not for a long while." Bro makes it as clear as day. "Do I make myself clear?"

"Why!?" Dave doesn't even hide his emotion from his older bro, "neither of us did shit, bro!"

"Not yet, anyway." Bro tells Dave flatly, "I'm putting a stop to this before it starts.

“He doesn’t know I like him!” Dave didn’t mean to say it. The words just came out. “I mean... as a best friend... it’s embarrassing.”

Bro takes back the phone by yanking it out of Dave's hands.

Bro starts skimming through Dave's contacts. Dave can hardly make out what is going on, that is until bro puts the phone up to his head.

Bro answered the phone with a deep, uncaring voice, "this John Egbert?"

"No, this is his father." Dave could hear John's dad's voice coming from his own phone.

"Why are you answering for him?" Bro asked him.

"Because I wanted to speak with his friend for a moment." John's dad was sounding awfully polite for what a rude asshole Dave found his bro to sound.

"Who might you be?"

"I am Dave's older brother." Suddenly bro sounded more polite.

"Wonderful to met you," John's dad sounds excited at the idea of meeting Dave's gaurdian. "This is perfect."

"I wanted to have a conversation with you, you have impeccable timing." John's dad said, "I was just about to find out how to get into contact with you!"

"Why do you want to speak with me?" Bro bluntly asks.

"Well... now... is there another way I can contact you?" John's dad suddenly sounds a bit uncomfortable with talking over Dave's phone.

"Say it here and make it brief." Dave's older bro didn't waste anytime, "I am a busy man, I’m sure you are as well."

"Yes... well." John's dad still sounded nervous over the phone, "I don’t think this is easy to explain. And well, I answered because I wanted to speak with Dave to introduce myself."

Bro sounded even more pissed than usual as he asks, **"why?"**

Dave's heart sinks as he hears the words,

"It seems my son has taken a fancy to your brother." John's dad doesn't even sound phased by the concept of something that just shattered Dave's world completely.

"Really." Dave's bro takes a moment to accept the thought, "you don't say."

Bro asks, "and where is your son, right now?"

"John's downstairs, I can get him for you... but I may need some time." John's dad explains, "see I didn’t exactly... ask John for his blessing to speak with Dave. I just wanted to know if he was... a right fit for my son. So I was going to bring John's phone down to him and ask if I could speak with Da-"

"Doesn't matter." Bro no longer seemed interested in what John's dad had to say. "Let your son know that he isn't allowed to speak with my bro again."

"I don’t think that’s for the best," John's dad speaks up on Dave's behalf, "the boys get well along from what I hear. My son is an upstanding young man and I think he’s a positive influence on Dave, John gets good grades and stays out of trouble... If you think John might be a bad egg then take my word for it, you have nothing to worried about."

"Dave is stressed about this kid." Dave's bro puts it bluntly. "I don't want him talking to him."

"Now that’s a good reason they should talk this out. I’m not one to tell others how they should raise their kids, but my son has been stressed too, same as Dave." John's dad explains, "John was scared about rejection, but it seems not that they two of them will both be fine."

John's dad just goes off, "now, I had suspicions about Dave being a bad apple, because he seems to use foul language and it’s starting to rub off on my son. But I don’t think that alone is a good reason to not allow them to speak any longer. I think Dave could use the positive influence my son gives all of his friends."

John's dad sounds more than agreeable, "if you don’t want Dave dating so young that is understandable."

"Right." Dave's bro forced a word in, "I don’t want him talking to John either." .

"I can speak with my son about this if you want me to. We can work something out together, something where you don't have to worry about Dave getting stressed or the two of them talking about anything inappropriate." John's dad paused, offering Dave's bro a chance to respond. "Sir?" Dave's bro wasn't talking. "Sir?"

Dave's bro suddenly hung up. He started messing around with the phone for a moment. Dave was more than startled to realize that his bro blocked the user from sending more messages right before he handed it back to Dave.


	2. Chapter 2

Your name is Dave Strider and you feel equal parts like shit and like you're walking on air.

John Egbert wants to date you. You want to call him up and tell him just how badly you wanted to be with him but how afraid you were to say anything. You could just go on your laptop now and message him. But your older bro is so fucking over protective. He's monitoring you to make sure you don't go online.

You sit down on the couch and mindlessly rest your back on the sofa as you drift off to sleep.

* * *

You wake up. You look around the house. It looks like your bro is out. He left you a note.

Going out.

I dismantled the wifi.

Don't think about leaving the apartment,

unless you want to go up on the roof.

You know what will happen.

You crumple up the note and toss it towards the wall. You feel like screaming. He thinks he's going to stop you. You look around for your cell, the fucker took that too.

Fuck him. You don't give a shit. You're going to contact John and tell him that you love him back, you don't fucking care. You look around for your bro's iPad. If you find it you can text John, you remember his number you can call him if you just find something to use to call him.

* * *

You didn't want to leave.

It took you five minutes to build up the nerve but when you did you felt confident walking through the door and into the hall. You walk right across to your neighbors door.

You knock onto the door and wait for someone to answer. There's a middle aged women who smells like ferrets, she's wearing a old pink robe and holding up a cup of coffee. It must be like 6 in the morning right now. Her eyes are closed and she looks tired.

You don't know even what to say. Shit you should have come up with something, you're just gonna ad-lib and hope something coherent comes out.

"Hey, sorry... uh... my bro ended up taking his phone and mine when he went out and I need to-"

"Say no more." Your neighbor rubs her eyes as she yawns. "If you need anything, kid... just ask."

* * *

She let you go onto her porch, now you're listening to the ladies phone ring. You're hoping that John picks up-

"Hello? Who is this?" You hear John's voice.

"It's me, man." You laugh a bit.

"Dave!" John instantly started talking to fast for your mind to even register. "Mydadtoldmeeverything.Hesaidthatyourbrotherwas-"

"Whoa whoa whoa, slow down, man." You chuckle.

John takes a deep breath. "Dave. Let's just start with the important thing first. You want to go out with me? _me?_ "

"Yeah... yeah, man... I'm like... crazy about you." You confess. "I've been thinking about confessing how I felt for like months now... but... my bro's being such a fucker. He took my cell and he cut out our wifi so I have no internet and I had to go to my neighbors and-"

You shut down, you start tearing up. You're crying.

* * *

It took John a while to calm you down, he started crying too. You apologized and told him that you might not be able to talk to him again anytime soon. You don't know if you can find anytime to leave the apartment. You confessed you're not allowed to leave. You confessed that's why you can't go to school. You confessed you never feel safe.

"You should call someone, Dave... someone can probably help you."

You shake your head like John can see it. You told him no. You can't bring yourself to do that, your brother is smart. He's too clever and can probably find a way out of anything. People have called the cops on him before. He never gets caught beating you on the roof or in your home. He always finds a way to say that it's a brotherly spat or discipline. He can weasel his way out of anything.

You had to leave and go back to your apartment so you told John you had to go. John was sad that you weren't willing to get help, but you're only gonna be under that roof for a few more years... then... maybe John will wanna move somewhere with you and you two can really start dating.

You thanked the woman who gave you the phone. She told you that her door is always open if you need anything and that she loves baking. You smiled at her.

* * *

For the next week, your bro has been going out someplace to get his work done. He must have just shut off the internet entirely and not just the wifi. Now he has to do his work somewhere else even though he records his weird shit in his room. You keep sneaking out to visit the neighbor and as a thank you, you clean her windows and take her trash out to the dumpster for her.

John is keeping your spirits up, he keeps telling you that he's gonna be waiting by the phone till you call him next. He keeps making you laugh and flirting with you. He's telling you everything that he kept a secret from you. How he kept staying up and night, tossing and turning worried about your bro randomly strifeing you or how John can't stop picturing your face and that he's been getting distracted in school. You told him you never take off the shades he bought you, you never stop picturing his smile. Whenever things get rough for you at home, you can always rely on John to cheer you up.

Last talk the two of you had you confessed that you loved him. That you knew you were young but you couldn't help yourself. Every time something horrible or bleak pops into your mind, you'd contact John and he'd just be a light that banished the darkness of your thoughts. It went from a like to a crush to a love to a need. You need to talk to John, like you need to breathe, it keeps you sane.

You're so thankful that the lady let you use her phone. You offered to help her do her dishes in the morning. She told you that she's fine and she can do the dishes on her own. She just appreciates that you're grateful. She said you're a good kid and that brought you to smile. You don't like showing people your smile, but John's disolving your cool kid persona. He's chipping you down and making you share how you really feel. _Damn._ You have to make sure that you don't smile around your bro or else he's gonna figure out that you've been talking to John.

* * *

Another day goes by and you just finished up talking to John. You just helped the lady fix up her garden on her balcony. You sent John a text showing how cool it is she grows her own tomatoes. John thought it was the sweetest thing that you thought gardening was cool. He pointed out that Jade would love to hear that. You should start talking to her again too.

You smiled as you opened up her door and walked out of her place. Your eyes fall on the man walking down the hall. Your smile drops, so does your heart. You want to scream when he grabs your wrist and drags you into your apartment.

He strips himself of his belt.

* * *

You fought back, probably a mistake cause he hit your forehead with his buckle in the squeamish. You shouted at him. You don't care if anyone hears, you don't care if he duck tapes your mouth shut. You're gonna tell him to fuck himself and of course he's gonna reply that you're bitching cause you don't know a god damn thing about the world. He's so sure that John is going to ruin your life and break your heart and you scream at your bro

"Who hurt you?!"

He turned around and left to go to his room. He was done with you.

“Bro!”

You called him back.

“Bro!”

He slammed the door to his room.

"Sure! Run away instead of talk to me! I don't want to hear your bullshit excuses anyway!"

He wasn’t coming out.

You didn’t see the door open...

But when you turned around he was right behind you.

“You are not going to speak to this kid.” Your bro hands you back your phone, “you can talk to your other friends.”

Your bro glares down at you from under his shades. “Not him.”

“Fuck you.”

"If you don't listen to me, you don't want to know what will happen." Dave warns you. "Don't drag other people into your fuckin' messes."

* * *

TT: And then what happened?

TG: he gave me back my phone

TG: and here i am

TG: he wont let me talk to john

TG: think you can like deliver a message for me

TT: I can literally copy and paste anything you write and deliver it like a letter.

TT: I won't even read it if you don't want me to.

TG: thanks

TG: it means a lot rose

TT: Of course.

TT: I'm more than happy to help.

TT: Take your time writing what you want to say and I'll ask John to write you something and we can delete the messages in between so then if your brother checks your phone he won't find anything.

TT: I'll send you John's message next time you speak to me.

TT: I'll be sure to be careful and only send you random messages when I want to speak to you for me.

TG: this is so fuckin cool of you rose

TG: thank you

TT: It's no trouble at all...

TT: And Strider...

TT: Thank you for allowing me to help you.


End file.
